What do people notice about you right away? It’s not always what you think.

How do you nail an impression every single time? Studies show that people subconsciously pick up on two key factors in any first impression: 

  1. Competence
  2. Warmth

Appearing competent, that makes sense. We can all figure out what to say and how to act in order to appear competent in our jobs and lives. Generating warmth can be more difficult.

The truth is you cannot come across with warmth if you have automatic interactions. Here’s what I mean: when we exchange pleasantries, we’re not having honest interactions. We become transactional, not international.

“How are you?”
“Not too bad.”

That wasn’t a real question, and the good news is that wasn’t a real answer.

Most of what we say is a pleasantry, a habit.

When we treat conversations as interactions, not transactions, we throw people off guard. They’re not used to honest interactions. Ask a real question, and give a real answer.

  • Hard to nail an impression if you’re automatic/ using pleasantries.
    • “Not too bad”
    • “Hangin in there”
    • “Oh it’s a Monday”
    • Email sign off “Regards”
    • You didn’t ask a real question, but they didn’t give a real answer
  • How do you greet people? Are you present?

Want to find out more? Contact me for a chat

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